My New Name from the Indian Tribe

[Jefe]

The Medicine Man has dubbed me "Weeping Penis".

He gives me this organic, herbal, free range treatment known only to the Indians after I get this condition after payday. The tribe calls this miracle remedy:

"Penicillin"

[Douchebag]

You got the clap???
Round of applaws if you do - but for being to commando for your own good!

[nowonmai]

The Medicine Man has dubbed me "Weeping Penis".

He gives me this organic, herbal, free range treatment known only to the Indians after I get this condition after payday. The tribe calls this miracle remedy:

"Penicillin"

Can I be "Running Sores"?

[goat balls]

Dude you better cover that thing up. It's terrifying the sheer number of bizarre things you can get these days. It's not worth it. Take the handjob.

I got a surprise kiss from a hooker in a bar in the Philippines one night. Next thing I know I'm testing positive for TB. Remember the TB test, they stick the needle under your skin on the arm and you get a red bump? And depending how many millimeters it grows in 24 hours blah blah. What a clusterfuck.

[nowonmai]

I got a surprise kiss from a hooker in a bar in the Philippines one night. Next thing I know I'm testing positive for TB. Remember the TB test, they stick the needle under your skin on the arm and you get a red bump? And depending how many millimeters it grows in 24 hours blah blah. What a clusterfuck.

Surprise kiss. Almost the bar equivalent of the bog seat. Dirty boy!

[goat balls]

It sounds like a crock of shit but I was looking to my left, felt someone sit down to my right, turned my head and nice wet kiss.

I'll tell you about Marilyn's Blow Job bar next time. The sign on the pole-on the street-actually says Marilyn's Blow Job Bar. Cubi Point Phillipines. Home of the now infamous Cubi Point Officers Club. And yes, my name is on those walls.

[Jefe]

Actually, I was joking. I use MOPP GEAR (Army for Mission Oriented Protective Posture i.e., Chem, Bio Suits/gear) whenever it's questionable. I am actually quite settled down compared to my first posting days here from Colombia when RR3 was pretending to be a CIA agent and recruiter of Colombians etc., for Iraq and all. Another RYP "contact" circa Akil Collins etc. LOL; "OOPS!!! Sent a guy working with Colombians my "I am CIA and can man up 2,000 Colombians within a week" email. "Really?" "Details? Cuz I am here and have 500 of them and know everyone in town who recruits, far below your numbers" "Uh, uh....OK, but I am really a firefighter...." He banned me when I copied the emails onto the Flag. Kurt "revived me"

But I am interesting in visiting the PI. Not the nightlife scene but scuba, hang out for a few months. Not a hostal, but not a hotel type budget.

Thank you in advance.

[goat balls]

You can find anything you want in the Phillipines amigo. At any price. I've spent a lot of time there and highly recommend it. The people are very friendly but the food is kind of weird. The condoms are too small for gringos so take your own if you need them. Their condoms will cut your junk off like a rubber band. Very painful to try this out and I don't recommend it.

I'm fairly certain that the Meat on a stick they serve at the roadside stands is dog and I'd almost swear that it might be cat. Frankly I don't know what the fuck it is so don't eat it. The main beer is something called San Miguel and it's made with formaldehyde. The next morning all you can taste is formaldehyde. They probably do that because of the searing heat and humidity. Keeps the beer from spoiling and it won't kill you immediately I suppose. The formaldehyde also hopefully will kill whatever other godforsaken bacterial death parasites that you can pick up along the way. So it's good to drink a lot of their beer. Maybe it's jungle medicine. Just makes for god awful puking the next morning and when mixed with the heat and their food will make you feel like you're gonna die. But you won't. I didn't. And then you can go play golf.

I don't know about the skin diving. I flew every square inch of those beaches and all I saw were sharks. Everywhere. So fuck that. But the golf is great. Ball will fly a long way in that heat. They've got mountain courses, jungle courses, ocean courses. I stood on tee one day and watched a whole team of jungle thugs come out of the jungle and completely dismantle a giant power line station in a few minutes and carry it on their shoulders back into the jungle. That was on one side of the tee. On the other side a seal team came out of the jungle and asked which way they went.

Great place man. Cheers.

[nowonmai]

You may as well just slam your cock in a door rather than take up the offer of Marilyn's Blow Job Bar.

[goat balls]

You may as well just slam your cock in a door rather than take up the offer of Marilyn's Blow Job Bar.

I'm not telling that story. It still wigs me out to this day.

[Jefe]

I had a great offer from a Phillipino General to set up a company with him in the PI. I had to turn it down as I met him thru an employer and that would be an ethics/contract violation. The guy was a seriously good guy too and we would have done fine there.

After I finish my Asia tour, I will certainly look at it. I worked a lot with Phillipinos (they do a lot of labor on US EMBs abroad). I like them, I like their chow and I hear Mindanao is a very friendly place.

I have always wanted to take over an island. PI is a good place to do it.

I hear there are Tour Agencies offering "Shoot a Drug Dealer" safaris now too.