by dogtanian » Fri Feb 01, 2019 4:05 am
I’m sure we used to have these threads each year, a decade or so ago. Thought I might as well squeeze it in while it’s still January. Here are mine in no particular order:
- Nicholas Maduro does a Gaddafi by going to ground, before eventually being pulled out of a hole by Colombian troops and offered amnesty in Sweden, where he’ll spend his last years driving a bus loads of unemployed Somalis around Malmo. On his last day before his retirement he’ll be stabbed with a zombie knife after an argument about chewing Khat and feet on the seat upholstery.
- The UK will leave the EU with No Deal in May or June after a short delay to pass necessary legislation. The EU will try to precipitate a Max. Schadenfreude Brexit, however the enduring fortitude and talent of the British will ensure a brighter than bright future, due to god’s own decree that the sun never sets on the British Empire.
- South Africa will continue to go all Zimbabwe as white farmers (who are the last people standing in the way of a food security crisis) continue to be raped and murdered. The mainstream media - led by CNN and the BBC - will continue to deliberately ignore these events, because all white people obviously deserve as much rape and slaughter as possible because it’s totally fair payback for their ancestors instigating Apartheid... even though it was only the Dutch ones... but nuances don’t matter because all BBC reportage is now limited to 280 characters... and besides the grinning white catholic school kid is still alive which means that priority will be given to headlines that disclose his location / employer / new girlfriend etc.
- Dr Jordan Peterson will become Prime Minister of Canada. Transsexuals will protest across Canada, but these will be thwarted when Dr Peterson orders Health Canada to secure & withold all supplies of synthetic testosterone. After the protestors express how oppressed they feel, they will all go home and watch Amazon Prime.
- Bannon and Trump will continue to make progress with their presidency objectives, by moving closer to war with China, funding for a border wall, and the total eradication of Islam. The US and Canada will become best buddies and Peterson’s new crowdfunding platform will be used to raise funds for the three aforementioned policy objectives.
- There will be a major terrorist incident orchestrated and activated by George Soros, as a final act of revenge upon the world for things (like Brexit and Islamisation of the west) not going the way he had planned. But his plot will be foiled by Viktor Orban, who will then be installed as life president of the European Council, on a tide of support by Italy, Austria, Denmark, Poland, and the Swedish Government In Exile (now based in an igloo in Nuuk).
There ya go.
Cheers,
"Truth is cool; but unattainable..."