Jokes

The Black Flag Cafe is the place travelers come to share stories and advice. Moderated by Robert Young Pelton the author of The World's Most Dangerous Places.

Moderator: coldharvest

Re: Jokes

Postby friendlyskies » Sun Jun 08, 2014 5:31 pm

Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes. They had no fire, so they threw one of the cigarettes overboard, and the entire boat became a cigarette lighter.
"4 cylinder Camaro=communism" El Presidente

"You can smoke salmon but it's not quite the same as smoking heroin." nanuq
User avatar
friendlyskies
Vata Loca
 
Posts: 7459
Joined: Sat Aug 26, 2006 5:36 pm
Location: Atlantis

Re: Jokes

Postby nowonmai » Tue Sep 09, 2014 10:58 pm

Image
3 days no post. This place isn't dead. It's got alzheimers.
User avatar
nowonmai
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 11542
Joined: Tue Feb 08, 2005 8:52 pm

Re: Jokes

Postby Hitoru » Wed Sep 10, 2014 6:48 pm

There was curmudgeon that said he was no one, that used to post lively and somewhat entertaining things on the internet site known as the Black Flag Cafe.
He constantly bitched, belittled and moaned about other posters opinions and finally cried "I quit" and "Fin".
Then he would come back to bitch some more and then disappear for awhile.
Then what does he do one night while drunk and bored ?

He posts a picture of his soul.
What are you? Some short sighted trigger puller? - RR3 .
Mr.wRong.
User avatar
Hitoru
Arbol Basura
 
Posts: 3549
Joined: Tue Mar 20, 2007 8:49 pm
Location: Tejas

Re: Jokes

Postby nowonmai » Thu Sep 11, 2014 12:33 am

Hitoru wrote:There was curmudgeon that said he was no one, that used to post lively and somewhat entertaining things on the internet site known as the Black Flag Cafe.
He constantly bitched, belittled and moaned about other posters opinions and finally cried "I quit" and "Fin".
Then he would come back to bitch some more and then disappear for awhile.
Then what does he do one night while drunk and bored ?

He posts a picture of his soul.


Actually mate, I left once previously because of fake accusations of bullying toward another poster caused by Penta then came back when she was banned. I then called out Pelton for being an arsehole by allowing vlindsay to infiltrate the forum; making her a moderator and then ignoring the fact that she published lies based on hearsay as academic truth about posters on the board in a document that we were not allowed to read. Then when people naturally got pissed off about this, he treated them like cunts so as a result a bunch of other people left - fansy, Aryan etc. Then friendlyskies and svizzerams colluded in a nasty little set-up which resulted in me and flipflop being banned by Svizzerams in an abuse of her moderator power, Basically, this killed the board once and for all and Kurt has been barely seen since. Hubris by Pelton and a nasty little clique who, having seized power on the board because Pelton is such a pompous prick that he only tolerates arsekissers, have shown that they haven't got the wit or personality to handle it. Meanwhile the clapping chimps who would dutifully turn out to shout down any common sense have all fucked off to the hills. Leaving you and a couple of nonentities standing next to the trainwreck wondering what the fuck happened. It's not me you should be angry with, but it's okay, I forgive you.

My soul is blacker than that anyway.
User avatar
nowonmai
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 11542
Joined: Tue Feb 08, 2005 8:52 pm

Re: Jokes

Postby Hitoru » Thu Sep 11, 2014 6:40 am

I'm not mad, it just seems that Q and I are the only gun-slinging bar fighters that post anymore.
What are you? Some short sighted trigger puller? - RR3 .
Mr.wRong.
User avatar
Hitoru
Arbol Basura
 
Posts: 3549
Joined: Tue Mar 20, 2007 8:49 pm
Location: Tejas

Re: Jokes

Postby Hitoru » Wed Sep 17, 2014 9:57 pm

Image
What are you? Some short sighted trigger puller? - RR3 .
Mr.wRong.
User avatar
Hitoru
Arbol Basura
 
Posts: 3549
Joined: Tue Mar 20, 2007 8:49 pm
Location: Tejas

Re: Jokes

Postby friendlyskies » Thu Feb 12, 2015 4:24 pm

What's the worst part of locking your keys in the car at an abortion clinic?


Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.
"4 cylinder Camaro=communism" El Presidente

"You can smoke salmon but it's not quite the same as smoking heroin." nanuq
User avatar
friendlyskies
Vata Loca
 
Posts: 7459
Joined: Sat Aug 26, 2006 5:36 pm
Location: Atlantis

Re: Jokes

Postby ReptilianKittenEater » Wed Feb 18, 2015 3:37 am

SCOTTISH COMPASSION


A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs.

Three women, from England, Wales, and Scotland, were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man.

The English woman said, "Have you ever had a hug?" The man said, "No," so she gave him a hug and walked on..

The Welsh woman said, "Have you ever had a kiss?" The man said, "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on.

The Scottish woman came to him and said, "'ave ya ever been fooked, laddie?" The man broke into a big smile and said, "No".

She said, "Aye, ya will be when the tide comes in."
User avatar
ReptilianKittenEater
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 3121
Joined: Thu Mar 25, 2004 3:18 am
Location: St. Catharines, ON, Canada

Re: Jokes

Postby Chimborazo » Thu Apr 23, 2015 3:56 pm

Two cats are swimming across a river. One's name is "One Two Three" and the other's name is "Un Deux Trois." Who makes it across? One Two Three, because Un Deux Trois cat sank.
"The terrain is just too wiley coyote for me to risk it. Slam into arch, rope breaks, in the distance as I plummet 'meep meep'" -Caliban
User avatar
Chimborazo
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 4219
Joined: Wed Feb 15, 2006 7:12 pm
Location: RVA

Re: Jokes

Postby michelle in alaska » Sun May 17, 2015 10:54 am

No Apologies.
michelle in alaska
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 2534
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2007 7:45 am

Previous

Return to Black Flag Cafe

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Majestic-12 [Bot] and 15 guests

cron