So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Where to go, what to eat, where to stay, guides, and taxi drivers.

Check here to see what other BFCers have enjoyed.

Moderator: coldharvest

So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby JITW » Tue Nov 29, 2011 5:40 pm

Ok, some practical advice - all of the following will get you a gig overseas:

-Get a bunch of certs in IT

-Learn to read, write and speak fluently a useful language that most round eyes cant master (I would suggest Any Chinese Dialect)

-Join the Military, go Ranger of you want a civilian gig shootin N looting, IT if you want to work a desk

-Learn Internet Marketing (then you can work from a laptop)

-Get your commercial diving cert

-Get your Paramedic Cert

-Go to Culinary School

-Become a man whore

All of the above will take around 4 years of schooling and boots on the ground to get experience before you will be employable overseas in a "cool" gig (except Man Whoring)


~JITW
DEATH VALLEY MAGAZINE
The Magazine for Professional Adventurers and Interesting People
http://www.deathvalleymag.com
User avatar
JITW
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 978
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2011 6:28 am
Location: Virginia - Iraq - Kurdistan - Indonesia - Thailand

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby gnaruki » Thu Dec 01, 2011 6:38 am

How many dumb e-mails regarding this topic have you received since starting your online mag?
User avatar
gnaruki
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 1767
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2011 12:39 am
Location: Pacific Northwest

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby rickshaw92 » Thu Dec 01, 2011 11:24 am

-Go to Culinary School


Really James? I was about to start a chefs apprenticeship before I ended up with the rickshaw gig and it's something I will be looking at doing eventually. What kind of gigs are there other than going to S.E. Asia and opening a place there?
Im reallly fuclimg pissed but fespite that I can still hit a tarfet at 1000m plus. mayVRVe bnot tonight but it qint beyond the wit if man. Nowhammy.
User avatar
rickshaw92
Pikey Bastard
 
Posts: 8910
Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2004 1:28 am
Location: Airport Inn trailer park

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby JITW » Fri Dec 02, 2011 3:54 pm

gnaruki wrote:How many dumb e-mails regarding this topic have you received since starting your online mag?


For the past 6 years I typically get between 50 and 200 emails a week asking "how do I get a contractor job"

I once got over 1000 in a single day after some print paper quoted me



~JITW
DEATH VALLEY MAGAZINE
The Magazine for Professional Adventurers and Interesting People
http://www.deathvalleymag.com
User avatar
JITW
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 978
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2011 6:28 am
Location: Virginia - Iraq - Kurdistan - Indonesia - Thailand

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Kurt » Fri Dec 02, 2011 4:12 pm

rickshaw92 wrote:
-Go to Culinary School


Really James? I was about to start a chefs apprenticeship before I ended up with the rickshaw gig and it's something I will be looking at doing eventually. What kind of gigs are there other than going to S.E. Asia and opening a place there?


I do not know what the deal is with cooks but my advice is to do it soon because:

One delivery guy on a bicycle not paying attention can take out your rickshaw knee.

Everyone needs and wants food.

As a person who jumped into a profession late in life and actually did pretty well at it, what I recommend further is to learn to do the stuff no one wants to learn. Like if everyone wants to learn sauces, then try to find out what everyone eats but no one wants to learn how to prepare it. (what I did was everyone wanted to learn web interfaces and php programming to use them while no one was even demanding that be a feature. I went for boring stuff that everyone wanted...archiving and retrieval and large scale status board display.) When you start out you should have a crap income but you will get free food if you work in a kitchen.
And from thence they went to Beer....(Num 21:16)
English Bespoke Tailor New York City
Internet research and investigation
User avatar
Kurt
In Manus Manus
 
Posts: 19661
Joined: Mon Mar 08, 2004 6:29 am
Location: New York City

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby JITW » Fri Dec 02, 2011 4:30 pm

rickshaw92 wrote:
-Go to Culinary School


Really James? I was about to start a chefs apprenticeship before I ended up with the rickshaw gig and it's something I will be looking at doing eventually. What kind of gigs are there other than going to S.E. Asia and opening a place there?


Yep – go to a 2 year Culinary School, work in a HOTEL kitchen for 2 years and be a White Person and you can pretty much just show up in any big city in the 3rd world, walk in every 4 star hotel in town, hit every expat bar and eventually you will get some sort of gig

I have a bunch of friends that cook in Asia and the Middle East who got their job exactly that way. You may not always get a kitchen gig, it could be bar manager or something like that

I would not go with opening a chow shop in the 3rd world

When I retire I am totally going to go to Culinary School

~JITW
DEATH VALLEY MAGAZINE
The Magazine for Professional Adventurers and Interesting People
http://www.deathvalleymag.com
User avatar
JITW
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 978
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2011 6:28 am
Location: Virginia - Iraq - Kurdistan - Indonesia - Thailand

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Mikethehack » Fri Dec 02, 2011 4:54 pm

You forgot one:
Appear on X Factor/Big Brother/other reality show.
I'm not really a proper reporter, due to the chronic lack of discipline, negligible attention span, and a certain juvenile difficulty taking serious things seriously.
Andrew Mueller.
User avatar
Mikethehack
Pimpmasterus Generalismus
 
Posts: 8405
Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2004 6:34 pm
Location: The Irish colonies

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Fansy » Sat Dec 03, 2011 1:51 pm

ive decided i need to learn how to cook because im going to be a stay at home husband/dad if at all possible, im getting really sick of leaving the house
"...we support members' rights to privacy."
- Robert Young Pelton
User avatar
Fansy
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 2921
Joined: Thu Oct 07, 2004 7:40 pm
Location: Bernie Country

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Kurt » Sat Dec 03, 2011 2:24 pm

Fansy wrote:ive decided i need to learn how to cook because im going to be a stay at home husband/dad if at all possible, im getting really sick of leaving the house


I think a magical world awaits you.
And from thence they went to Beer....(Num 21:16)
English Bespoke Tailor New York City
Internet research and investigation
User avatar
Kurt
In Manus Manus
 
Posts: 19661
Joined: Mon Mar 08, 2004 6:29 am
Location: New York City

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby gnaruki » Sat Dec 03, 2011 7:30 pm

Any advice on becoming on trophy husband?
User avatar
gnaruki
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 1767
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2011 12:39 am
Location: Pacific Northwest

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Kurt » Sat Dec 03, 2011 7:45 pm

gnaruki wrote:Any advice on becoming on trophy husband?


Yep, serious advice here from a guy with experience (not as a trophy husband though).

1. Be Jewish.

2. Pass a background check that proves your Jewishness.

3. Live in a Jewish area of the US.

Then all you gotta do is go to a Jewish matchmaker and say I am Jewish and Single and then you will be Jew vetted. If you pass you may be soon married to a successful Jewish single woman who is taking fertility drugs.

With any luck you will be out of your mothers house and having sex with a real live lady.
And from thence they went to Beer....(Num 21:16)
English Bespoke Tailor New York City
Internet research and investigation
User avatar
Kurt
In Manus Manus
 
Posts: 19661
Joined: Mon Mar 08, 2004 6:29 am
Location: New York City

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Osiris » Sun Dec 04, 2011 5:59 pm

gnaruki wrote:Any advice on becoming on trophy husband?



1. Be black (being mixed will do).

2. Get some game (Mystery Method works if you don't have any).

3. Dick slang until a woman with money approaches. Finding out her father has been knighted and that she has two masters degrees paid for out of pocket is an added bonus. More on dick slanging here -


It worked for me, it can work for you too!

(Side effects include taking exotic pets to the er at 2am, having to do all the household chores, being uninvited from family holidays on account of your skin tone, and knowing that if you leave her, you probably really will never find better.)
The impossible I'll do immediately, the unimaginable will take some time. http://coolbyintent.com/
User avatar
Osiris
BFCus Regularus
 
Posts: 687
Joined: Mon Jan 03, 2011 4:29 am
Location: Jinan, China

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Kurt » Sun Dec 04, 2011 6:35 pm

Good post Osiris...but my "Be Jewish" still has some advantages:

You just have to "Be Jewish" . You don't have to learn anything or say anything. You do not even have to have a job or live on your own. You just have to be the right man for the right biological clock.

You may not even have to impress the woman. A 50 to 60 year old woman does the talking for you.

So if you have some ambition and like to talk...be Black. If you have never cooked for yourself and you hate your mother because you love her and need her so much, then be Jewish.

In conclusion. There is no way in hell a 44 year old white guy is ever becoming trophy anything.
And from thence they went to Beer....(Num 21:16)
English Bespoke Tailor New York City
Internet research and investigation
User avatar
Kurt
In Manus Manus
 
Posts: 19661
Joined: Mon Mar 08, 2004 6:29 am
Location: New York City

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Mikethehack » Sun Dec 04, 2011 7:18 pm

Kurt wrote:
gnaruki wrote:Any advice on becoming on trophy husband?


2. Pass a background check that proves your Jewishness.


What? Pull your knob out?
I'm not really a proper reporter, due to the chronic lack of discipline, negligible attention span, and a certain juvenile difficulty taking serious things seriously.
Andrew Mueller.
User avatar
Mikethehack
Pimpmasterus Generalismus
 
Posts: 8405
Joined: Fri Mar 26, 2004 6:34 pm
Location: The Irish colonies

Re: So Ya Want a Cool Gig Overseas - Some Advice from JITW

Postby Kurt » Sun Dec 04, 2011 7:23 pm

Mikethehack wrote:
Kurt wrote:
gnaruki wrote:Any advice on becoming on trophy husband?


2. Pass a background check that proves your Jewishness.


What? Pull your knob out?


This is America. You could say in a way most of us are Jewish.

It is even more detailed than knob inspection. Interviews, background checks. Talks with neighbors, Talks with Rabbis. The whole bit.
And from thence they went to Beer....(Num 21:16)
English Bespoke Tailor New York City
Internet research and investigation
User avatar
Kurt
In Manus Manus
 
Posts: 19661
Joined: Mon Mar 08, 2004 6:29 am
Location: New York City

Next

Return to The Black Flag Cafe Recommends..

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest